Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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