she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
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