Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
