Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(419): View more from Ohio

I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids

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(804): View more from Virginia

i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry

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(703): View more from Virginia

You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.

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(847): View more from Illinois

I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(306): View more from Saskatchewan

I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.

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(515): View more from Iowa

Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.

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(504): View more from Louisiana

Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.

(985): View more from Louisiana

Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.

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(206): View more from Washington

Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.

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