She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
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