party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Randomize
