id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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