If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
