I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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