i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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