I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize