is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
me + whiskey = a bad person
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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