I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
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his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
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THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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