a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
meet me or not, i'm out of control
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
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