He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
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