I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
My throat feels like a candle.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
These 21 Drunks Said The Darndest Things
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
These 25 Irresponsible People Blew All Their Cash On Drugs, Booze, & Sex
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.