Where are you?
In a non slutty way
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Randomize
