yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
