I'm drive I can fine osifer
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
These 19 People Are Into The Grossest Sex Fetishes
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
People Weigh In On Whether It’s Okay to Bang Your Roommate
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.