I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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