I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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