real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
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