white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
