Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
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