why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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