Where are you?
In a non slutty way
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
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I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
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The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
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