Where is the hickey?
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
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I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
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