She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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