the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
