Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
