No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Randomize
