Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
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