She's JV to your varsity
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
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