I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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