This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
