I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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