i think i have two assholes
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
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