HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Randomize
