grandma shit on top of the toilet
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
