I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize