Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Randomize
