i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
