turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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