Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
