There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
