And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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