I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Randomize
