i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
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