are you still at the devil's house?
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
