she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
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